> NO info.



Archives

June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
August 2008
November 2008
December 2008
February 2009
April 2009
May 2009
August 2009
September 2009
November 2009
March 2010
April 2010
July 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
October 2011
November 2011
January 2012
February 2012
April 2012
June 2012


Links to Nowhere

Shuang Han
Jinhui
Ka Yun
Huiling
Wenbin
Jieli
Karseng
Weiwei
NJ03S13


sh00t away


fading

Other infomation here
Designed and made by FsDesigns

Friday, December 31, 2004


Great.. new year in less than 2 hours.. I'm counting the seconds now to 2005. And what am I doing here? AT HOME. BLOGGING. Talk about no life.. I imagined myself at a countdown party, most probably the foam extravaganza at Sentosa or something, celebrating the end of the teenage years and embracing the dawn of adulthood.. But having said that, I guess I agree fully with my mom; she said it was totally insensitive to party away when hundreds of thousands of people are suffering from hunger and shivering out in the night air without a roof over their heads... SO.. here i am at home. I know I'm repeating myself, but you can take it as an attempt to drive home a point. Maybe I'm trying to convince myself. Perhaps my other self is sulking in one dark corner. Seriously, what if the moon suddenly fell down from the sky?

Really should do a recap for year 2004. It's going to be rather long. But it has been a long year anyway...

Tempted to start off with a cliche beginning, something like "I started the year with much anticipation and apprehension" or some nonsense like that. But it's like, who will know what the year brings? Anyway, it's JC2; what do you expect? Every sane kid will start by making a new year resolution "I will study hard this year!".. I did it because my mom was glaring at me when I laughed at my brother... I didn't keep it though. In year 2003, I didn't care about anything due to some mental conflicts.. 2004 was really a busy year; it drained me mentally and physically...

Speaking of this depression thing last year.. most of my friends, especially the girls, are somewhat skeptical. I'm too tired to explain, too pissed to prove anything.

Basically, the class remained intact.. rather missed Jess though. Maybe because nine months had brought the class closer, so things in class were always pleasant. However, the lack of spirit and carefreeness was evident.. maybe everyone was so occupied with the As... However, the uptightness soon wore off, and everyone was soon caught with ccas and stuff. January passed soon, and February soon followed. March arrived with a bang; chinese AO and PW results.. Salas and I got A2s we barely deserved. I remembered at that time I was more worried about recruitment for my weiqi team than my results, but an A2 is fine.. only one new junior wasn't entirely an optimistic outlook, but Jianyue showed enthusiasm which was infectious. I admit I felt rather betrayed when he revealed his plans to go HC, but in the end he stayed. An IP student called Wenshu also showed his face, and than disappeared. Not exactly a championship winning team, but the future had to be laid.

Somehow, I was having more fun in J2 than J1.. and then migraine struck again. It's no excuse for failing everything though; I admit I didn't study. Also, life in B01 was getting rather tiresome.. at the end of March I did not get above a B for GP.. However, the final piece of my team's jigsaw finally arrived in the form of Xudong. At last I was ready to go for the dream I had been chasing since rejection last year.. Also, things were looking up academically; I sought the help of a certain Dr Chan, who gave me advice and tips, not only for studies, but also life.. April arrived like a breath of fresh air; my weiqi team was training hard, my class was playing soccer and lan regularly together, HELP camp committee was slowly beginning to gel. I was starting, slowly to be happy again.

Some might remember me mysteriously selling tickets for a dance concert, and then escaping from college day, risking mine and the necks of a certain Kiamin and Salas.. Maybe a few of you will recall me rather distracted and occupied during the period from early April to late May. Perhaps some of you guessed it, and I really appreciate the discretion and sensitivity shown, especially by the gossipy class girls.. maybe it's just because you all didn't care? Anyway, that night I truly understood what true friendship actually meant.. when I think of how the three of us ran in the darkness to the school gate; how Kiamin hid from Mr Lim; the way Salas kept his composure when I was on the edge; Leo staying behind to shield and hide our disappearance from the school authorities.. it sort of made all the trouble worthwhile. Maybe I did too much, threw excessively into the circle.. but as Jael said, "Who will he do it for? It's obvious. For a girl." I have no regrets.. we all turn silly when it comes to this kinda things. When you see past the beauty and appearance, you know it's not infatuation anymore. You can laugh all you want.. but when you experience it yourself, its a surreal feeling.

There was this classic scene during this period of time.. the table tennis final between HC and NJ. We lost 3-2, and I can't help cursing Ben Koh for leaving.. anyway, HC was cheering a good-sport cheer for us, and while the rest of the NJ supporters were respectfully standing, watching and clapping, me and Salas, two figures with shirt tails out, were standing with our backs to the HC people. Plus, we were standing ten metres from both parties, somewhat like in the middle of a ring. You should have seen those HC people glaring at us; I really laugh when I recall that scenario...

June arrived, and with it came the weiqi Lanke Cup. We exceeded all expectations by taking HC down, and nearly took the scrap of a certain NYP.. best JC in Singapore, at least for the year 2003, 3rd in the whole country. Shocking, huh? Especially since NJ had no weiqi team before my batch for many a year, never winning anything.. But in my heart, I knew we were good enough, we were the stuff of legends; me, Yinghao, Xudong, Salas, Taffy, Jianyue and Wenshu. The Team. The Champs. Maybe never again.

I shudder when I recall the squash captain saying "Silver shining armour.. valiant warriors" or crap like that. But I guess he was emotional.

After a short trip to KL with Salas, Leo and Reubs, rushed back the night before to attend HELP camp. After planning as a committee member for six months, I admit I was shocked to be downgraded to a sercurity member.. Jiehui was in charge of the camp, and he told me, along with Kee Yih, that I was needed there. Whether for boosting ego or whatever, Kee Yih made me second-in-charge after him. The opportunity to slack was just a myth; I was pooped by the time I reached home. And she wasn't free after I got back; I realise now we didn't have a common free date, and probably never will for the near future. So there you are.. anyway the experiece was fulfilling, and the children were surprisingly grown up for their age. When you think of the fact that they come from single-parent families, you got to feel for them.. the HELP people were really nice, and I made some new friends, which even now I still have contact with... one of them was even involved in an affair with my friend's friend. The world is damn small lor..

Oh ya.. I was hooked on gunbound for a good part of the six months. If anyone was wondering why I never did my homework, you now know.

If anyone thinks after June was all mugging.. anyone was wrong. I didn't seriously start studying till late September. Sure, there were studying sessions with Reubs and Swee Lee in Ang Mo Kio library.. but they were to ease my guilt a little.

Either the last months were super boring, or my memory is fading.. but overall it was a good year. I learnt alot about people, about life, and more importantly about myself as a person.. also realised that happiness remains the single most important thing in our time of existence. When you lose something, you might gain something in return.. be grateful for what you have.. darn it I'm sounding like a crap ass now, think I'll better stop being sentimental and go back to being cynical.

Going to the army and becoming a man. That's what they all say.. but year 2005 promises that much. With a new cap on my head, and renewed hope for the future (which is an outright lie, but have to say it anyway..), here comes 2005. Best wishes to everyone, and I love you all. Really, I do.

I feel so dirty now. Happy new year.


_'Jx]- faded at 10:10 PM