> NO info.



Archives

June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
August 2008
November 2008
December 2008
February 2009
April 2009
May 2009
August 2009
September 2009
November 2009
March 2010
April 2010
July 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
October 2011
November 2011
January 2012
February 2012
April 2012
June 2012


Links to Nowhere

Shuang Han
Jinhui
Ka Yun
Huiling
Wenbin
Jieli
Karseng
Weiwei
NJ03S13


sh00t away


fading

Other infomation here
Designed and made by FsDesigns

Sunday, December 26, 2004


I was looking at the mirror sometime around 2 am this morning, something I vowed never to do. It's rather scary really, knowing that there is another image of you existing, probably in a different plane or dimension.. you can probably reassure yourself that it's just a reflection and nothing else. To me, it's like looking through a window, at myself, doing everything opposite to my physical actions.. imagine one day the image stops and says "Hey you there. I'm sick and tired of doing what you do in your world." After all the screaming and hysteria things could turn out pretty cool. Anyway, what I'm saying is, there could be another dimension to the world as we know it. H. G Wells once wrote that there were three dimensions to the world as we know it; if we drew a line connecting the three, we'll have our fourth dimension.. which according to some complex theory would allow us to travel in time... I'm writing a short story based on this mirror-image theory, of another me in the same world but who has taken a different path in life, doing the things I didn't do, making the mistakes I sought to avoid.. I might be seeking a level above what I can achieve now, but someone's got to start somewhere; my other ideas are now expounded into books under some asshole's name, so I can't use them anymore. Just my luck.

It's Boxing Day, and I slept at 5 am last night while talking to Vic on the phone. Sometimes it just feels good complaining and whining about the problems at hand, and although the other party offers you advice which you most probably have heard or thought of, the solace one feels at the moment is particularly satisfying.. Maybe I have been running away from all the problems in my life. Perhaps I never could muster the courage to confront them, instead putting them off time and time again.. After these remaining 10+ days I'll be breaching the outskirts of adulthood.. I'll need to settle all my childhood and teenage problems before that.

Sometimes I get so lost writing that I forget for a moment this is a blog and not a diary.. if my enemy were to stumbe upon this page I'll be dead. Like that loser who reported to the school authorities for my anti-national comments... Sharon Phua actually thought I was fighting with another guy over a girl, and that I looked as if I was suffering from severe problems over relationship.. since we have graduated it doesn't matter anymore, but I have to say this: Miss Phua isn't as stupid as we make her out to be. She was actually really concerned about what I was writing.. that doesn't mean I forgive her for giving me a 5 for GP prelims... Speaking of GP, my J2 teacher Yap Ee May has left for Taiwan after her resignation from NJ, which is a tremendous loss for the school, though I don't give a shit.. I can never probably thank her enough for the help and encouragement she has given me. At least I'll keep in contact with her.

My old teacher Mrs Woolhead came into my dreams sometime during these few days.. she was rather old when I left her tutelage at the age of 12, so hopefully she's in good health, but I'm not optimistic.. I lost contact with her all these years, and could her re-appearance have any significance? She taught me how to write, showed me the power of imagination, gave me the glimpse of the power a pen could give... I can remember the time she said those words to me:

"You can write, my boy.. you have the gift for writing."

After six long years.. and those words are back to haunt me... I'm not even sure if she saw right anymore.

_'Jx]- faded at 1:58 PM