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Friday, June 17, 2005


I've just fast-forwarded my process of going totally insane by buying Demon Days. Having never heard of the group Gorillaz, I guess the advertisment with it's pretty cool animations did the artist proud.

Intoxicating stuff!

Way more effective than the diluted pints of swill-tasting beer I tried to drown myself in last night.

I've never actually forced myself to listen to ditzy notes and mindless lyrics. It's quite refreshing for a change.. I've only got to keep this up for another few hours or so and I'm positive my brain will slowly dissolve into mush. If it hasn't already. Maybe if I continue thinking in my current state of mind brain juice will start seeping out from the corners of my ears. I'll probably taste it, and decide that beer tastes nicer.


Anyway, a continuation of mindless ranting:

As I was saying, Cal and Lil' Wong will hopefully keep me in check. And I can't remember the rest of the stuff which I wanted to say about them, so we'll leave it as that.

And I think I would have wanted to give an account of an Army Man's Party. I guess a good summary would inevitably include drunkards and bad singing.. but that wouldn't do Master and the SGTs any justice. They sang pretty well, or probably because we were so groggy even screeching sounded like sweet whisperings. The pool competition was exciting; Kyle won by flukes on the way. The final was a classic, one more at home in a movie scene. Black in, white in, and victors switch accordingly. I'm more pleased to say that I managed to escape bowling.

So, less fondly perhaps than I thought I would, I wave goodbye to my friends disappearing in the distance.


The last item is really an enigma. I have no idea whether it's good or bad; I just know I'll probably die. Stay-in puts paid to any activities which I had in mind. Being on course means I'm busy most of the time. Being posted to base is altogether a different matter.. I'll probably be able to look for her all the time. Heck, I'll even have the mood. But now, the door is completely shut.

It doesn't matter whether I confess now; it's never going to work out. I can choose to take the load off my chest, or let her be happy and unperturbed. A gamble that will only benefit me, yet I'm uncertain. Because she's going to be disturbed. I shouldn't care but I do.

Anyway, we'll see tomorrow. Some part of me is hoping that she'll suddenly come up with some excuse. The other feels dead.

~

This is strange. As I'm writing these words now its actually 2231. That's nearly 3 hours past the mark.. I'm feeling melancholic, as always. Maybe more so, because I watched Shoot! on Channel U. The issue at hand was relationships and sex. The less significant details included Xiaxue's appearance.

I found the opinions stated by the youngsters' side quite up to expectations. Meaning that their comments were worthless.

This point was quite interesting though. It's in Mandarin, and translations are always off the mark. But it went somewhere along the lines of this: Guys do not value a girl's worth by her sexual offerings, or more plainly, her body. He'll want to know she's the one, and the best way she can repay him, is live up to his expectations and return his love. What crap haha. I think this topic has outgrown it's value.

_'Jx]- faded at 7:57 PM