Saturday, September 17, 2005
I just missed it by just a whisker, but ya still missed it again. It's only a whisker, but still.. if this goes on I'll be forever ruing the opportunities and missing the people who pass by just this once, and then disappear forever.
I'm going to miss Sgt Zi Jian. It's going to be kind of weird working without him. Sort of got used to him solving everything, all the various technical faults that crop up randomly. The steady presence that reassures, that everything will be fine no matter what. It's not really something everyone can understand or visualize, but it was a comfort to know he was there. ZJ was the first spec to show me around, help me settle down, showed me the ropes. He and Ah Heng, the first 2 who took me into Archer. My two big brothers who protected me, laughed with me. And now both of them are gone.
"Focus," he used to say. "Anything can be solved if you put your heart into it."
I have always maintained it was a cliche. And I still do. It's just different when someone says it, and then shows the way.
Each and everyone of us are walking in separate directions, towards our own destinations, each with our own purposes. It need not be a straight line; it curls, twists and bends. Sometimes lines meet, and we make an aquaintance. When the time comes, each party goes off in different ways, often remembering the other for some time; sometimes forgetting a meeting ever took place. Some lines cross more than others; a few pass by each other just once. The intersection might not last long, but neither does a touch, and the feeling lingers nonetheless. It never completely disappears, even after everything is gone and done with, and the dust has settled. But just can't help feeling the slight tinge of regret. That the same moment will never return.
I can't remember much of last night. The dinner was a bore. We just ate and ate and ate.. meat. Chuwei and Joseph just hogged the menu, not that we had any complains. After all, a company dinner = a great wayang show, so it was just sitting back and amusing ourselves with derogatory comments.It's not as if I purposely ignored the significance of my first WKSP dinner, but I was just too damn tired. Trying to get a whole company of tanks on-road is not fun. Although having Subash around is a great asset, I can't help but feel only regulars are up to these tedious tasks. So many sign on, and where are they? Slacking, smoking, sleeping.. Only Ah Heng's constantly on the move.After that, Subash brought me and Zihao to Cheeky Monkeys. That place makes Zouk and Chinablack look tame.
_'Jx]- faded at 11:25 AM