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Sunday, May 21, 2006


Spending the last three weekends at home is a dreadful affair, especially since next week is guard duty time. On a saturday, where all the events meant to stretch a few weekends all pile up on the same day. It's just ironic, so compellingly coincidental. And on a low last note, my toe is snubbed.

Missed soccer this morning, which is the second successive session I've not turned up for. Surprisingly, a dull ache. I hadn't expected that. Everything's been just shades of black and white lately, and this is as close as I can get to a splash of colour.

When football transcends words... Haven't had that feeling for a long time.

The thing about being a mecenary, is that you've got to be ready for up-and-downs by yourself. That's the essence of being in a team; you handle everything as a group. Because there's bound to be understanding and chemistry already nutured, there's no need to light a sudden fire with stones on the roadside. As it is, I often find myself in the position where I shiver in some corner against different assortments of rain - some pelting so hard I can barely see through the fierce droplets brimming with kinetic (or is it a mixture of potential? I digress) energy, some just sheets of lines coming down from the sky, some drizzles not worth any attention whatsoever.

I've played with better people. Okay la, with Alaric that's maybe not true. Definition of better? Faster, better ball control, skills in kopi bags.. Alaric's probably not in the top three for any of the categorys I've mentioned, but then again, people who are ranked here are seldom nice to play with, even lesser against. I concede that it's probably his presence that binds our play so seamlessly. Jianwei and Kwok Lei, just average players, but when average players play to their strengths, it's a killer. There's no point when everyone fights for the limelight; mutual acceptance, people, that there are role players and support players. Then again, who am I to comment. I'm probably the way I am, because I want to be a Riquelme, and not everyone wants to be a Forlan and Senna.

Come to think of it, no one wants to be a Forlan or Senna. Probably Jianwei.

I remember Phil Ball, the Spanish soccer correspondent for soccernet.com, once stating emphatically that the reason why Riquelme couldn't settle in Barcelona was just the way he played. He isn't Ronaldinho, perhaps on the same plateau, but just at the chin. He inspires, only when he feels like it. Sometimes, he drives past defenders with ease, laying off passes which make mortals like us gasp and say "how did he do that?". He wants control of the game, even when he's miles away. In a friendly game, teammates will just laugh, and say "that's him." But I don't want to be a Riquelme in a serious match. I don't want to constantly look for my Forlans, Sennas and Sorins. I don't want to be seated on a wave, going up and down at an inconsistent basis.

It just like some sort of untapped power; you need someone to focus the energy, another few to feed of it. Just that, who's the someone?


It's probably just mindless gibberish. But I'm as serious as a semi-drunk dude can get. Uncle Melvin's married, and the wedding was.. I can't remember.

_'Jx]- faded at 2:50 AM